As I was look at my bank account, WOW. We've spent heck of alot of money this month and it's not even over yet. Crap. Majority of that spending went towards Christmas gifts, very nice ones. So far we've spent well over $100 in postage alone. Why am I freaking out? Probably because I hate spending so much money. Even if I was rich (which we are not) I'd be very frugal with money. I grew up living in a yoyo. One second we'd be well-off and in the same breath, poor. I never had that stable financial life growing up. I've seen my mom stress and cry. There was this one moment I'll never forget. It was a week or two before Christmas and I was 9 years old. My mom was sitting on the kitchen floor, crying with her hands in her face. I sat down beside her, wrapping my arms around her. I asked 'mommy, why are you crying?' "I don't know how we are going to feed everyone for Christmas." All our relatives decided to come to our house for the feast. Apparently no one knew how poor we really were. I'll never forget that moment. My heart was so sad for the pain my mom was going through. I never wanted that for my children. So perhaps all this spending anxiety stems from that moment.
All I know is, money isn't everything....but honey, it sure does help!!!
No comments:
Post a Comment