1. One of my guilty pleasures is to dip a spoon into the peanut butter jar and then sprinkle dark chocolate chips ontop..followed by a sip of wine....life is good after that!
2. I always secretly wanted to be a nurse but never followed that path in life.
3. I adore being a mom - something I've always wanted to be when I was a child. It's by far the most rewarding and challenging job.
4. My Best Friend is my husband, Josh. He truly is my soul mate, completing me in every way possible. I LOVE being married to him. He makes me smile each and every day.
5. I was the first female Honor Caddie at the Broadmoor Golf Resort in Colorado Springs - when I was 15 years old.
6. One of my only regrets is not studying abroad during college. I would LOVE to travel to Europe someday soon.
7. Never had a fear of mortality until i had kids. (I stole this idea from Cindy - but it's so true)
8. My parents lived in a haunted house in Colorado Springs - had plenty of ghostly encounters - felt like someone was always watching me...but being a ghost hunter would be a pretty cool job!
9. My favorite shows are: Nip/Tuck, Ghost Hunters, Desperate Housewives and Grey's Anatomy.
10. I have an obsession with chocolate.
11. My bad habit is picking at my nails.
12. I will admit...when I was 6 years old, watching Dukes of Hazzard - I was in love with Bo and Luke Duke. I seriously convinced myself I was going to marry one of them someday.
13. I love to bake - it's like therapy to me. When I was in 4th grade, my nick name was 'Cookie,' because I'd always bake cookies for the class.
14. I keep having dreams of my grandparents that just passed away - almost like a guilt of not getting a chance to say goodbye to them.
15. My first car was a 1981 Diesel Volkswagen Rabbit that smoked each and every time I started it...quite embarrassing to a 16 year old...
16. Las Vegas will always hold a dear and loving spot in my heart...it's where Josh and I got married
17. I hate bean soup. I rarely hate anything but when I was 5 years old, we had these babysitters who spanked me because I didn't eat their bean soup. From that moment on, even the smell of it makes me nauseous.
18. My favorite sounds - #1 my kids giggling #2 wine coming out of a bottle (you know that gurgling sound?)
19. I know how to ride a horse really well. I miss riding!
20. I almost died as an infant - am severely lactose intolerant - parents kept giving me milk and it wore down my immune system to the point where I was really sick. Thank God they figured out what was causing it! (still very lactose intolerant by the way)
21. My Brother-in-Law Pete not only taught me how to use a stick shift, but also married Josh and I - he's pretty much been there for most of my major life experiences (minus the child birthing)
22. I LOVE country music. I LOVE dancing to it.
23. I was never good at science and always was scared of it. Then in college I accidently signed up for the hardest biology class (meant for premed students) and ended up getting a 'B' in it. VERY proud moment.
24. My new favorite quote which I'll live by "Life is short, Break the rules, Forgive quickly, Kiss slowly, Love truly, Laugh uncontrollably, And never regret anything that made you smile."
25. My happy place is where Josh and I went on our honeymoon - Kauai - where my fabulous Aunt Rose and Uncle Dave live. Truly paradise.
Friday, February 06, 2009
"Jesus loves you, I don't"
I am feeling MUCH better these days - (compared to my last post)
I have some in-laws (cousins) of Josh's to thank. It's one of those cases where I look at my life and then look at their low lives and immediately thank God for all that we has given us. Ok I'm not trying to be mean but these people (without going into the long story of it) basically came out, attacked me and calling me inappropriate names. Apparently they have had hard feelings against me from the day Josh and I came home to tell the family I was pregnant with Preston. Ok - I'll share the story.
So there we were.....
Josh's grandparents home (at the time we were stationed in Phoenix) to share our good news to Josh's family that we were expecting our first baby. During this time, Josh's younger cousin got pregnant out of wedlock. I was sitting there sharing our news and added that we conceived this baby a month AFTER our wedding and so it wasn't a bastard child. I had NO intention of insulting the cousin who was pregnant and not married...apparently she and her mother (and sisters) all took offense.
Over 3 1/2 years later......
I get this email from Josh's aunt blasting me from this one instance. I was like WHAT?!
During this time, the presidential elections were going on and a much heated debate was going between those cousins and aunt and us. They were for Obama and we were for McCain. Well we were mature enough to want to debate the issues at hand versus them - they flat out started attacking us. Thus the name calling from them had started and then the accusations continued.
Well the mentality of these people - well living in a small town, no higher education, never leaving this town - this is all they know and care to know. They don't have the best reputation in the area...
The only reason we have to see these people is for Josh's grandparents - who would be heartbroken if they knew we all despised each other.
I really didn't have much of a problem with them until the whole attacking me for no reason started - but looking at the whole situation makes me laugh. If this is the most power tripped they will ever have - well then that is sad.
Josh and I have accomplished so much and will not let these people bring us down.
I have some in-laws (cousins) of Josh's to thank. It's one of those cases where I look at my life and then look at their low lives and immediately thank God for all that we has given us. Ok I'm not trying to be mean but these people (without going into the long story of it) basically came out, attacked me and calling me inappropriate names. Apparently they have had hard feelings against me from the day Josh and I came home to tell the family I was pregnant with Preston. Ok - I'll share the story.
So there we were.....
Josh's grandparents home (at the time we were stationed in Phoenix) to share our good news to Josh's family that we were expecting our first baby. During this time, Josh's younger cousin got pregnant out of wedlock. I was sitting there sharing our news and added that we conceived this baby a month AFTER our wedding and so it wasn't a bastard child. I had NO intention of insulting the cousin who was pregnant and not married...apparently she and her mother (and sisters) all took offense.
Over 3 1/2 years later......
I get this email from Josh's aunt blasting me from this one instance. I was like WHAT?!
During this time, the presidential elections were going on and a much heated debate was going between those cousins and aunt and us. They were for Obama and we were for McCain. Well we were mature enough to want to debate the issues at hand versus them - they flat out started attacking us. Thus the name calling from them had started and then the accusations continued.
Well the mentality of these people - well living in a small town, no higher education, never leaving this town - this is all they know and care to know. They don't have the best reputation in the area...
The only reason we have to see these people is for Josh's grandparents - who would be heartbroken if they knew we all despised each other.
I really didn't have much of a problem with them until the whole attacking me for no reason started - but looking at the whole situation makes me laugh. If this is the most power tripped they will ever have - well then that is sad.
Josh and I have accomplished so much and will not let these people bring us down.
Friday, January 16, 2009
Definitely NOT my better days
So the word and feeling of the day is gross.
If you are a fellow mother, you will understand this.
The past couple days have been busy - doing what mothers do best - take care of every one BUT themselves. I have not had the opportunity to shower in a day or two. Usually the kids will nap in unison at some point in the day - giving me some free time - but not so recently. Mornings are usually me getting kids up and at'em while Josh gets ready for work. When Josh gets home, I'm usually busy getting supper on, kids fed, cleaning up messes (well that's a nonstop, all day chore), giving kid's bath and ready for bed, picking up more messes, and trying to squeeze any amount of time with Josh. By that time, everyone is in bed or getting ready to - I'm exhausted. Did I mention I haven't had a full night sleep in 3 years? I'm so busy making sure every one else is taken care of that I tend to push my physical and emotional needs aside. Not that I choose to intentionally but feel forced to.
This morning, I woke up feeling utterly gross, unattractive and downright sad. Of course I got up with Myla and was trying to keep her happy. Then Josh comes out, showered, refreshed. I told him I needed a shower and haven't had one in days...he just looked at me with pure disgust and said "that's gross!" and he backed away from me like I had some sort of disease. I felt more attractive after giving birth than at this moment. All I want to do is cry. Am I getting uglier? I look our wedding photos, admiring what I once looked like, felt like. I want to be that person again. I want to be viberant, fun and outgoing. Where did that go??
How can I get back to that? That is my goal for this year. Now the hard part is finding the person I once was. Where do I start?
I just want to add (kind of like a disclaimer) :
I do want to add that Josh is a wonderful husband and father. He is not a bad guy or has no intentions of misdoing either. I feel like I am the one doing the harm on myself. I just need to find ways to dig myself out of this hole I dug myself into.
If you are a fellow mother, you will understand this.
The past couple days have been busy - doing what mothers do best - take care of every one BUT themselves. I have not had the opportunity to shower in a day or two. Usually the kids will nap in unison at some point in the day - giving me some free time - but not so recently. Mornings are usually me getting kids up and at'em while Josh gets ready for work. When Josh gets home, I'm usually busy getting supper on, kids fed, cleaning up messes (well that's a nonstop, all day chore), giving kid's bath and ready for bed, picking up more messes, and trying to squeeze any amount of time with Josh. By that time, everyone is in bed or getting ready to - I'm exhausted. Did I mention I haven't had a full night sleep in 3 years? I'm so busy making sure every one else is taken care of that I tend to push my physical and emotional needs aside. Not that I choose to intentionally but feel forced to.
This morning, I woke up feeling utterly gross, unattractive and downright sad. Of course I got up with Myla and was trying to keep her happy. Then Josh comes out, showered, refreshed. I told him I needed a shower and haven't had one in days...he just looked at me with pure disgust and said "that's gross!" and he backed away from me like I had some sort of disease. I felt more attractive after giving birth than at this moment. All I want to do is cry. Am I getting uglier? I look our wedding photos, admiring what I once looked like, felt like. I want to be that person again. I want to be viberant, fun and outgoing. Where did that go??
How can I get back to that? That is my goal for this year. Now the hard part is finding the person I once was. Where do I start?
I just want to add (kind of like a disclaimer) :
I do want to add that Josh is a wonderful husband and father. He is not a bad guy or has no intentions of misdoing either. I feel like I am the one doing the harm on myself. I just need to find ways to dig myself out of this hole I dug myself into.
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